you want to hang that where??

“Willingness to compromise with others' ways of living and cooperation in common tasks, these make living happy and fruitful.”

Sri Sathya Sai Baba: Indian Spiritual Leader, Philosopher

Having officially been living at our new apartment for a little over a week now, Adam and I have already started putting our touch and design in every room :) It has been so much more fun (and much easier) than I ever expected. Along the search for our new living space, somehow we each got it in our heads that we had very different tastes when it comes to designing the overall look of the interior of a home. I suspect this might be from watching too many episodes of Love it or List it and House Hunters International =) I may have an addiction. Getting back to the topic at hand... I anticipated there could be disagreements regarding what gets to go up and where, but that simply has not been the case, which is great :) What a special way to put our personalized stamp on our place, by communicating and cooperating, together! I ask his opinion, he asks mine, and what's better...we actually are listening to one another's thoughts. I don't know why this is so surprising, we don't usually disagree often and when we do, we are usually able to resolve things rather quickly. Organizing and decorating our place has been more than what I could hope for and actually quite a fun time. I think that when we finally have family and friends over they will feel as though it is a good combination of both Adam and myself:)

now you're speaking my language

Today has me thinking about how important it is to show those who matter most to you just how much you love them. So often our families and our friends feel a lack of love and support for one reason or another...and whose fault is this? The problem may lie in the fact that the people in question are unaware of how they want to be loved as well as how the best way to love someone is.

During my undergrad education at WOU, I took this great child development course that truly opened my eyes to feeling as well as giving love. Who would have ever guessed that people do not give and receive love the same way??!! That's absurd. Cleeeeaaarly everyone is the same and thus how we love is the same. MIND. BLOWN. Not only is there not one universal language of love, there are five! Can you believe that? Five different ways people receive and give love! There is even a quiz to help you determine which language speaks best for yourself in case one doesn't immediately jump out at you upon viewing the list of five love languages: 1. words of affirmation 2. gifts 3. quality time 4. acts of service 5. physical touch. Upon actually taking the love language determiner quiz, I found out something unique about myself...I scored equally high scores of 9 out of 12 in TWO love languages! After further reading I found that it is fairly normal to have two language that score higher than the others, but to have two that rank the exact same high number of 9? If I wasn't interested before...this concept now had my full attention.

The two languages that, for lack of better words, blew the other love languages out of the water for myself were quality time and physical touch. The quality time language was an obvious one for me. I absolutely crave quality time with the people who mean the most to me in order for our relationship to be flourish. In regards to my family, Adam, and my friends, if I don't feel as though a genuine effort is being made to spend quality time with me I tend to feel neglected, which leads to unfortunate feelings of bitterness and even anger in some respects. It truly stinks to have quality time as my main love language for one reason...the advancement of technology. As technology continues to thrive and new ways in which NOT to see people face to face are invented I find that it gets more difficult for me to 'feel the love' so to speak. Having daily relationships with close friends like in one of my all time favorite television shows Friends seems to be a thing of the past, when this is what I truly desire. I love to see my friends as often as possible, to laugh with them, and genuinely be a part of their lives. I don't want to simply live on a Facebook wall or message. I can count on one hand the friends that know me well enough to KNOW that this is what I need. I am also convinced that this is part of the reason I did so well living on my own in a foreign country for a year...everyday after work my co-workers/friends went out for happy hour =) Thus spending tons of qt together. I can offer to take the blame for some of the 'not knowing' just how important quality time is to me, perhaps I never said anything, but not all the blame. Perhaps it will be me who must adapt in the end, which in turn requires me learning to be less sensitive.

Physical touch was my other high flyer. This one was interesting, but accurate non the less. I'm a hand holder, hugger and love kisses! Every time Adam and I go out and are sitting side by side I like-no, require us to sit so close that our legs touch. For me, it's the closeness that matters. I don't like to leave after a visit with my parents without a hug goodbye as well. Never underestimate the power of a good hug! With close friends I give hugs and/or high fives :) Apparently it's frowned upon to hold hands with all your friends hehe =D Perhaps this is why I love animals so much. Such soft, snuggly fur and most are up for a hug (length TBD by said animal;) I trained Falcon from the day I brought her home to be a snuggler! One would never know based on her normal demeanor, but she is a great napping buddy! So yes, I can see how touch scored so high on my Rach love-O-meter:)

The moral of today's post you ask besides getting to know a bit more information you never realized you wanted to know about yours truly? Learning and sharing with those whom love you most what your personal love language is can help to determine how positive your interactions and relationships will be. You, in turn, must also be willing to put in the effort to show love in the language that speaks best to those around you that you care for. How wonderful would it be if we all spoke one another's languages of love?? Give it a go, take the quiz and pass it on to those around you. Not only will it help you understand your own needs, but you can learn to love those in your life more efficiently and effectively :) That being said, do you best to remember the following: (like I have to every day)

The inside scoop on moving day. Fetrina style

Those dreaded words that NOBODY wants to hear....it's moving day. I have never met a person that enjoys moving. Sure, I enjoy parts of moving like the getting rid of random stuff part and the unpacking part (organizing is my happy place:) and the excitement of starting an adventure somewhere new, but really, I hate the act of actually moving. Wish Adam and I would have realized how difficult moving everything ourselves was going to be. Movers will be hired next time we move...if that ever happens. Side note: I looooove our new apartment =) It was a truly exhausting process, both physically and emotionally. I am STILL sore in every possible place days later.

In my mind, moving seemed pretty straight forward and dare I say it...easy. I had arranged to rent the moving truck for eight hours picking up the truck at 10:00 a.m., which should have been plenty of time, in addition to booking a storage unit for our extra stuff and things that we'd pay a visit to at 4:00 p.m. in time to drop off my bed and Adam's dresser using the moving truck before we needed to have it back by 6:00 p.m. Aaaaand breeeeaaaath....*Sigh. The day would have gone much smoother if everything would have gone to plan, but as anything rarely does, I should have known better. Numerous emotional breakdowns could have been avoided:)

The morning started out well enough, Adam and I were up around 9:00 a.m., coffee'd and dressed by 9:30 and off to get the truck by 9:45, grabbing breakfast on our way to drop off the first truck load was on the to do list. THAT never happened. Enter problem number one. We had the truck loaded up with all my heavy furniture and such before 10:30 a.m. Adam had sold his couch to someone from high school and they had said they were going to come by and get it at 11 a.m. Thinking this would only take about 30 minutes TOPS, Adam headed to his place around 10:30ish to be ready for them to get there. I had asked my mom if she wouldn't mind staying with our truck while we moved everything upstairs saving us the added time of closing up the truck in between trips or leaving our stuff open to the world. I told her I would call her when Adam was back and her and my dad would meet us over at the apartment. Almost an hour later around 11:30, no word from Adam so I called him to see what was up. Apparently the dude had yet to even show up. Seriously dude? I told Adam to message his friend and ask what's up, we had our own schedule to keep to after all. Literally after I hung up the phone with Adam my parents drove up. Hmmm....did I call them through osmosis?? :) They were excited too, I get it. We still had to wait on Adam though. My dad lasted oh about 10 minutes before he offered to go home and come back later:) My mom stayed. After another anxious hour of waiting and a phone call, Adam showed up. Needless to say that my good mood was gone. The dude was not only late, but also didn't bring the agreed amount of money and had to go to the bank after they got the couch in his truck. It's amazing how losing two hours can drastically change the level of stress in your scheduled day as well as your (my) mood.

We finally got to the apartment around 1 p.m. and of course there was no apartment entrance adjacent street parking on Hawthorne in the middle of a Saturday afternoon. I asked a neighbor if we could pull our truck in their driveway and unload everything real quick. He was not friendly or helpful and said no. What a jerk. We ended up double parking and unpacking everything onto the sidewalk. Adam and I moved everything up and my mom (like a champ) hung out with our things outside, making friends with everyone who came out of the building:) Random good note, we got to meet several neighbors in our new building and everyone was really welcoming and friendly:) (unlike the D-bag that lives next to our building). Adam and I left my mom at our apartment after we finished unloading my stuff and headed to Adam's to pack up his truck worthy items. This was around 2 p.m. It took us almost an hour at Adam's house, which meant we had an hour to unload the truck, go pick up my bed and get to the storage unit by 4. Keep in mind that neither Adam nor I had really eaten anything. I literally start to melt if I'm hungry and/or tired, but put both those together and you have a Rach-tastrophe. I become whiney, emotional, easily irritated, and less willing to do things any way, but my way. I'm not proud of the person I become when I'm hungry, but it is a part of who I am. Keep me fed, keep me happy.

                             

We had plans to grab lunch with my parents, but it quickly became apparent there was NO time for that. So, we said a fast goodbye and thank you and headed to the storage unit to sign papers sans my bed or Adam's dresser. Looks like more trips are in our future than originally allotted for. Adam stopped at DQ for food because I was becoming completely unbearable to be around. He basically saw me at my worst on the day we moved in together. Lucky Adam;) Another sunny spot: my worst was not enough to drive him away:) Score! Needless to say, we BOTH needed to eat something and felt much better/happier afterwards. Storage unit checked out and taken care of, we went back to get load my bed up to take out there. Adam is going to bribe a friend with a truck to help him move his dresser out there in a week or so instead of cramming in another trip. My bed...the only thing I have ever financed in my life, besides my education, was a BITCH to move. My Tempur pedic, not even fully paid off yet, was h-e-a-v-y and very difficult to move. The box that the mattress sits on was damaged a bit, which of course made me cry because I was on the brink of tears pretty much all day long anyways. We opted to put Adam's bed in our room instead because he is a tummy sleeper and the tempur pedic is not for tummy sleepers. He has a comfy bed so it is really a non-issue. I was just pissed that my bed got damaged by our lack of moving expertise.

To sum up, Adam and I finished an exhausting day of moving heavy, awkward things around 9:30 p.m. Both of us still had plenty left at our places, me less than him, but since Adam has Monday off he would be moving the rest over then. We relaxed, ate some dinner and started unpacking, which of course led to us being awake until about 1:30 in the morning:) Hi, my name is Rachael and I have clutter anxiety. Although the day was a cluster fuck for sure, together, Adam and I ended the day on a happy note organizing our kitchen cabinets and our bedroom :) To be honest, I'm glad we bookended our day with happy thoughts and feelings. The middle was a jumbled mess of emotions and such, but the beginning and ending were just.plain.great:) The most important thing that we gained from the experience of moving ourselves? Adam and I WILL be hiring movers next time and we sure do love one another a lot :)

 

Not the cheeeese, the keeeeeys!

So far 2014 has been pretty ding, dang, dong awesome with good changes on the wind :) Adam and I were able to find, apply and rent our first place together! We actually went and signed all five gazillion pages of the rental agreement aaaaaaad got our keys yesterday morning! Afterwards we headed straight to our new home to check in out:) Can you tell that both of us are just a teeny, tiny, bit excited?

Moving plans are in the mix for the weekend, which ironically is Adam's only weekend off in January, so we have both been going through our things and dividing everything into three piles: keep and move to our place, sell or donate, and move to storage unit we will be getting. It's a fairly daunting process, but also kind of fun! It's a strange thing to see your life divided into boxes though. Another interesting part of moving is seeing the items that have made the cut over the years. I still have dolls, stuffed animals and other items from my childhood that have managed to follow me through the years. I'm rather attached to them for sentimental reasons:) I have my room to pack up tonight and tomorrow and then I can start bringing bins over on Friday since I have the day off of work. Yay! We'll be moving the big things on Saturday when we have the truck. It's going to be a busy weekend for sure, but I plan on smiling big the whole time:)

This is a big step for us and for me since this is the first time I have successfully reached this part in a romantic relationship. I'm not sad one bit that I waited to take this important step until my 30's. It never felt right before Adam:) I know that it is going to be work at times, but really isn't this the case when ever you are living with anyone? We are not perfect people, but we do love one another an awful lot. I look forward to the new memories and adventures that Adam and I will have in the coming year and know that we will have no problem facing any challenges head on:)

Late last night after Adam got off of work, we met up at our place (I kind of love the way that sounds:) to do our walk through. Adam brought food cart pizza and I brought two shot glasses, a bottle of Lemoncello (sipping alcohol is slim pickings at my place presently;) a blanket and two pillows. When Adam arrived, we had a little blanket picnic complete with a Lemoncello cheers to keys and pizza in front of the fire that I "started,"(we have a gas fireplace;) It was a perfect way to start our time together in our new place.

Yours, mine, and OURS

I'm pretty sure most of my readers are aware that back in September-October of 2013 Adam and I decided that we were ready to live together :) Since then we have been looking all around Portland for that perfect first apartment, house, loft, etcetera. A few peeked our interest, but nothing was really ticking all of our boxes. That being said, about a week or so ago, Adam and I came across an apartment for rent on Hawthorne via Craigslist, which so happens to be one of our FAVORITE locations in SE Portland.

Naturally, we had to check it out seeing as the price was right, location was prime and the size was plenty for what we were looking for. Exciting thing number one, the property was still available after being on Craigslist for a day! Places are snagged up so fast in SE that if you don't pounce, you miss out big time. I had to work the day of the showing, but I told Adam that I trust his perspective and judgment aaaaaaand also to take lots of pictures! :) The viewing went fantastically and Adam fell in love with the place, but still wanted me to see it first. I made an appointment to view the apartment on Saturday, but insisted that if he liked it that much that we put an application in on it to at least hold it so no one could snatch it up! Nichole showed me the place on Saturday and I instantly knew it had to be our place! We both got applications in and after a looooooong 72 hour wait we got the news yesterday that we were approved! Adam and I are officially moving in together and couldn't be more stoked about it :) The apartment is a one bedroom on the 4th floor (no upstairs neighbors and a view!) and absolutely lovely! It is close to so many of our favorite places including our place, Zack's Shack:) We can start moving in on the 14th so now comes the SUPER fun part....packing, cleaning and moving! Cheers to starting 2014 out with a brand new adventure for Fetrina!

Simply living.

Once or twice a year I like to do what I call a 'go through/purge' of the many bins of everything teaching and future classroom that I currently have stored in our garage. This usually occurs on reeeeaaaaallly bored days or right before a move, which is what I am anticipating if Adam and I get the apartment that we applied for last week:) Anyhow, these bins hold everything from text books I deemed worth keeping (and spent hundreds of dollars on I might add!), to my own projects and classroom creations, to work samples filled with numerous ideas and lesson plans as well as books upon books ranging from elementary to middle school age appropriate for a decent classroom library. It is an extensive thing to store your future classroom year after year. I have literally been working on this collection since I finished my student teaching back in 2006, which is either VERY impressive or super sad :)
I've never been a fan of clutter, or at least not since I finished high school and moved away to college. I spent those four years moving almost every year to a new residence in Monmouth as well as moving home each summer. Since finishing college, I have moved four or five times as well. There is just no room for me to keep everything, nor do I feel the need to. It feels good to get rid of things that I no longer need or use on a fairly regular basis. I went into my year long Thai teaching adventure determined to live simply. It was a truly wonderful experience that I have tried to continue as best I can as a semi-settled adult in Portland, Oregon.
Going through my teaching bins is a bit more difficult because I have no idea what exactly I am going to want in my future classroom. I am basically guessing on what I will want and or will need when I actually get hired. I've been able to part ways with many items and older books that would no longer be relevant in my classroom library within the last eight years, but I'm certain I will purge more once I'm in my own room. This act of organizing and re-organizing my teaching tools serves another purpose as well...it allows me to smile, feel happy, and remember as well as feel my passion for wanting to become a teacher still alive within me. That, my friends, is a phenomenal feeling.

Ringing in a new fan-FREAKIN-tastic year

 

Last night we bid a fond fare thee well to 2013 and welcomed with open arms a chance for a fresh start with 2014. In general, I loooooove bringing in a new year! Last night was no exception:) Originally, Adam and I had made plans to spend the evening doing something fun out and about with two of our friends, but they had to cancel last minute due to being sick. Never the less, Adam and I were determined to find something to do:)

I was off work a little before 3 p.m. and headed home to meet Adam so we could go check out a few possible rentals around town that we were interested in. We ended up taking a tour of some new places opening up on Hawthorne Street, but they were teeny, thus not for us. By the time we had finished the apartment tour, Adam and I were both famished so we stopped for an early-ish dinner at Hawthorne Hop house. Totally worth it, that place is delish. With plenty of time before we needed to be ready for evening festivities, we were able to head home, relax a bit, let the bunnies run amuck and search Craigslist for other potential living spaces that meet Adam's veeeeerrrry specific check list:) By 9:30 p.m., Adam had asked me at least twenty times where I wanted to spend the evening. In the end, we landed on ringing in the new year at Side Street Bar on Belmont since we love that place and knew they were doing a little something for NYE. Of course when we actually arrived and saw how crazy busy it was, I immediately suggested going across the street to our second fave place on Belmont, Hobnob. It turned out to be the perfect combo of busy, lively, fun atmosphere combined with yummy munchies and tasty drinks:) Adam and I spent the night talking, laughing, reminiscing and sharing what each of us wanted for the new year. It was perfect :) Would it have been nice to ring in the new year with friends? Of course, but cancelled plans will never rain on our parade. Cheers to another year in the books for Fetrina and a brand new, shiny year of awesomeness in store!
Since we didn't manage to get a pic of us celebrating last night, here's our Happy New Year pic from Leavenworth last year:)